Waking up to reality is bittersweet. Once you are woke , there really is only one direction to go. One must continue to go forward, because going back to sleep is simply not an option.
I find that over the years, I was experiencing the stages of grief, which was hard enough on its own, but compiled with life's everyday challenges, it pushed me to the edge.
I survived it all of course . But now I've surpassed the grief, and now I'm on a steady diet of truth seeking behavior.
It makes life difficult at times because I'm forced to sift through every detail of daily life to stay functional.
Watching the news with others? I have to simply bite my tongue and let them absorb the lies because they are just not ready to hear the truth that lies beneath.
Discussing history is even more difficult. Knowing the truth is so obscured by propaganda makes it hard to simply accept what is printed in textbooks or pumped out on tv,'or portrayed in movies .
And on the topic of movies... it is so hard to not shout out when I'm watching a flick and I notice some symbolism encoded on the script, or the backdrop.
I wouldn't change it for anything, but being awake to the truth is hard.
For me it began with 9-11. I know that was the gateway for a lot of people. It's an easy one .
Of course 10 years ago I was convinced it was just a false flag done by the bush administration. Today of course I know that there is so much more.
If we are in fact much more than these meat wagons , and are in fact luminous beings in this constructed reality, we have the potential to truly understand the complexity of the world we are part of. It's an adventure worth taking.
I say that magic is real, and the occult nature of our belief systems is enough to start with. The truth really is out there. I will keep my mind open as I search for the completeness of it
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